Initially during the first week, Mum called to say she was concerned that ‘S’ was waking up during the night and wanting to “be with Mummy” which was concerning her. Once advised that this was a result of the new beliefs being introduced, she was reassured.

Generally there was overall improvement as shown by the supporting ‘Where does my child stand now’ casse history documentation. Both parents were very happy with the results. What they most noticed was that ‘S’ began understanding humour that had previously gone over his head and began making jokes that were quite complex.

He also became more assertive and confident, particularly at kinder and his energy levels in the morning were much higher. Overall, his general happiness and wellbeing increased. They will continue with the SleepTalk™ on a maintenance basis and are very pleased with the results.

Case History Submitted Nov 2010 by:  KJ

I have been using SleepTalk™ for approximately 6 months and the best thing that we have achieved is overcoming ‘R’s fear to go to the toilet and doing no. twos. ‘R’ had developed anxiety due to being constipated.  His two occasions that were on the toilet was a straining two moments and thus ‘R’ linked the toilet to being constipated and feared it greatly.   Conclusively, ‘R’s character, being stubborn plus the immaturity and lack of trust in his own body inhibited him from overcoming his fear.  The somewhat progressive tasks of transitioning from nappies to the toilet become a tedious, frustrating and stressful family issue.

After many frustrating battles with no result I took ‘R’ to Conquip, a incontinence school and had him regularly taking laxatives. He still continued to be fearful of sitting on the toilet especially when knowing there was business waiting to be done.   I took him back to Conquip to be told to increase his laxative.   A month prior to his second visit I had started SleepTalk™ but my nurse at Conquip had asked me to focus on getting ‘R’ out of nappies at night time.   I tried this for 2 weeks but ‘R’ developed such a bad rash that I decided to refocus back to toilet training for no. twos (‘R’ is trained to go to the toilet for wees but still wears nappies at night time).

We had changed the SleepTalk™ statements to cater for ‘R’ to stay dry at night, therefore when the focus was changed naturally I had to change the SleepTalk™ suggestions back to going to the toilet to do no. twos. We did this for three months and then on one weekend when I increased the laxative dose, I placed ‘R’ on the toilet and used all of my encouraging phrases. I also told him that we would have a party with balloons if he did a poo that night and I added in a threat (in a nice voice) saying if he didn’t do it then I would find a pillow for him to stay the night.

‘R’ called me to the toilet once, then twice with no result. The second time he wanted his balloons and I said that they would come once he had done the poo. A third time he called me and this time he had eventually done the business in toilet.   I was amazed, happy, relieved and hopeful that this would be the start to the end of this issue.   He did no. twos three nights in a row then he had a night off, then back on and off.   He now uses the toilet with ease although still with some prompting, although we have now incorporated the toilet time as part of his night time ritual for getting ready for bed.  It is becoming easier and easier and he is always very proud when he has finished his business.

The phrase I used on ‘R’ was the opening phrase, then the phrase ‘You know you can, you will do poos on the toilet. You are so brave.’ I repeated this five times, and then I finished with my closing statement. I do believe that by telling him that he will be able to do poos on the toilet and adding that he is brave actually helped him overcome his fear.  Additionally I read him books which centred around being brave and I dropped that word ‘brave’ occasionally in discussion especially leading up to toileting time.

Although it took much time, a lot of frustrating toileting moments with no results and a lot of customised settings to make it all happen I do know that SleepTalk™ plays a big part of its success and additionally has emotionally instilled mental strength within my sons’ mind. ‘R’ has become much more content with family life, adjusting to becoming a big brother and displaying more resilience. (‘R’ had developed an attitude as a consequence of losing the focus from being the single child as well as some additional changes in life.) He now displays a marked degree in maturity and more courage in getting through daily tasks he once feared such as going to the toilet in the dark and having his hair washed. There are still many areas of growth to press on and I am still using SleepTalk™ to build on these, for a mentally healthier and emotionally more balanced life in ‘R’s life.

Natalie Dwyer:  Accredited Consultant – 2011

After reading the book, we started the foundation process with our two daughters “M” aged 9 and “E” aged 5.  We had had a bit of a rocky time last year, and felt that the process may make the girls feel more secure and settled. At first, my husband didn’t feel particularly confident in doing the ‘Foundation’ statements on his own, so we took it in turns to say a sentence each – and this worked really well.  The first few weeks, we noticed that “M” would strongly sense our presence in the room and would squirm about in her bed as we slowly said the foundation statements.  Our other girl “E” would sometimes even talk and respond to our statements in her sleep – which was a little confronting, but we followed the advice in the book of soothing her into a deep sleep and then continuing with the statements.

After about 4 weeks, we noticed quite a difference in the behaviour of “M”.  She is a self-contained child – who is more of a ‘watcher’ than a participator – and suddenly she was actively seeking me out and sitting on my knee to watch TV, or even when we ate dinner.  This was quite unusual behaviour from her as she tends to like her personal space, however, we welcomed this with open arms, and now 5 months later, she still continues with this affection. She also seems to be more confident in herself and far more resilient to the ups and downs of school life – bouncing back when she is knocked down.

‘E’ s changes were more subtle than “M”‘s.  She seems to argue less with her sister and calms down more quickly when she has a tantrum.

In the September School Holidays we went away two weeks, and in the throes of travelling, we overlooked the nightly ‘Goulding Process’.  Once we arrived at our destination we noticed that the girls were arguing more than normal, so we decided to re-introduce the nightly talks.  Once we recommenced the process there was a noticeable turn around in their behaviour towards one another – which obviously has a follow-on effect to the whole of the family’s harmony and enjoyment of the holiday.

After doing a “Where Now’ evaluation with Natalie, we identified a couple of areas that we would like to provide support to “M’  At  present, we have moved onto a specific statement for ‘M’ and are currently working on a statement for ‘E’ with a view to introducing it before Christmas.  We have decided to stagger the introduction of specific statements so that we can properly check for changes in each child, rather than trying to identify them in both.

The Goulding Process has not only had a positive impact on the emotional wellbeing and resilience of our children, but also on our emotional connectedness as partners and parents – and I would highly recommend it to all parents as happiness in the home follows you into your daily lives. Kind Regards “J”

December 2011 – Natalie Cossar – Trainer.

Of course, we all worry about our children and there will always be issues for them which are out of our control, however, I am thankful to SleepTalk™ for giving me the skills to control the things I can.   I admit that I was initially daunted by the idea of doing SleepTalk™ every night, yet it soon became part of my routine and takes mere minutes.   I now actually enjoy this time I have to witness their peacefulness in sleep, especially when we have had a hectic day.   I hope that all parents and carers get an opportunity to learn and use Sleep Talk™.  Thank you Joane.”

SleepTalk™ Mum – LB

SleepTalk™ Mum MT – NSW

Consultant – Mary Lynch. NSW

His mum also says he is much more confident and “open” since doing SleepTalk™ so all in all this has been a wonderful experience for all – I am absolutely sure he will be talking at school this next term.”

July 2011 Update

“Ohhh Joane – You had to be the first to know – remember the little boy with ‘Selective Mutism’?  His mum just called me to say that ‘H’ has been and is talking to his friends at school !!!

She has seen him and it has been confirmed this week in his school report which was glowing, saying that he is a bright intelligent little boy who is well respected by his teachers and piers –  he is confident and happy.  He scored extremely well overall & excels in maths and music which are his favourite subjects.  Quite a different boy from last year.

You can’t imagine how proud, pleased and thankful his parents are – it has taken time, yet the change in ‘H’ in a year is unbelievable. I told her that its due to all the work she and her husband have put in  – they have hardly missed a night with SleepTalk™.  She said thanks and acknowledged that without SleepTalk™ she would not have believed it possible.

There are still some teachers and children he isn’t talking to however the school, ‘H’s mum and I are all confident that this is just a matter of time. Please pass this news on to any one that is interested in his story.  Many thanks Joane as this has been a wonderful and interesting journey working with this wonderful family, who are fabulous – they work very hard and I think they have only missed a couple of nights since we first started.

Of course like most parents they didn’t know what to expect and over the months they did occasionally get despondent, as they don’t always seem to notice changes – that’s when I jump in and do an assessment – then they get to compare and I can tell them what differences I notice in what they tell me and the changes I can see.  It’s also good to remind them where their son was when they first came to see me.”

Nov 2011 Update

“Joane, ‘H’ is talking in school to nearly everyone – all be it in whispered tones – but talking  YEEEEEEESSSSSS.  His mum is SOOOOOO happy – he is even now insisting that his granddad takes him to school.  I don’t know if you remember but we think the original problem occurred when his mum had to be taken into hospital unexpectedly.  He woke to find his grandma and grandpa looking after him….. he stopped talking !!  So massive changes have happened over the last year.”

Anne Denning – UK Registered Consultant . www.sleeptalklondon.com

With the assistance of SleepTalk™ – a year on he is a much healthier boy.  He sleeps as well as before the fires, has made new friends, tried new foods, can’t wait to go on his school camp and is engaging in life with a new confidence.  He is less fearful of change than he has ever been in his life.  When things go wrong as they inevitably do in life he deals with them far more calmly.  At the end of 2009 I wondered if the fires were still going to take my boy from me; now I have him back. Thank you Joane.”

SleepTalk Mum – JW – May 2011

Foundation process
“N saw enormous changes in a very short time frame, on commencing SleepTalk™. Though in the past she had been afraid to go anywhere on her own and would struggle to deal with anger and anxiety – mostly resulting in “melt downs”, within the first three weeks, ‘N’ had showed a significant turnaround.

N’s parents reported a number of changes after three weeks.
More able to talk through concerns calmly without melt downs.
Walked to the shops and scouts on her own.
Asked to go to school camp.
Had the first dry nights of her life.
Stopped hiding (and lying about) soiled pants and stopped soiling.
Happy to talk on the phone to people.

Parents report enormous positive feedback! And these are just some of the main examples. Even with such positive changes and feedback, ‘N’s parents expressed there was still some way to go with N’s ability to deal with anger, with her self-esteem and they expressed significant concern over N’s continued troubled relationship with her elder sister.

We chose to keep the ‘Foundation’ statements for some weeks longer and added in the sibling support statement, suspecting that the sibling relationship is potentially the prime area of pain and anxiety for ‘N’.”

Follow up
“On contacting ‘N’s parents three weeks later, I was informed that almost instantly after adding in the sibling support statement, ‘N’ regressed. She began (and continued to) soiling and bedwetting again and was less cooperative.  We chose to continue but not change the statements whilst ‘N’ was unsettled – and two weeks later the parents reported seeing slow improvement. She is very cognitive about the issue now too – shows a real willingness to beat the issue and a desire to be clean. She is well on her way to conquering her toileting troubles!”

Conclusion
“This continues to be a very interesting case to work with. ‘N’ had an extreme abreaction to the addition of a sibling support statement. This fits with the parent’s information given about the troubled sibling relationship and appears to be a deep source of anxiety and stress for ’N’. It seems that, upon adding that her sister loves her, her brain was not able to neither compute this nor take it on as truth easily. A month on and she is showing marked improvement but still has some way to go. Her parents remarked: “Thank God for SleepTalk™!” and are very grateful for the obvious effect it has had in their lives. I am grateful for their willingness to stick to the program with patience, noting that it is not a quick fix for their daughter but is slowly working love through the deepest parts of her doubts and fears. What a wonderful thing to watch.”

Up Date: 20 April 2011
“The mum just emailed me to let me know that it has finally turned a corner! Toileting issues have been under total control for a week now (and most of last week) and she is a “happy little girl”. Mostly holidays are bad for her – I guess, having her sister around with her full time – but they have been coasting through that alright too.  Great news to hear…just thought I’d let you know!”

SW – Consultant.

A few weeks later the mum reported that for the last two nights her son is now asking for the toilet to poo and is no longer scared and overall there has been a significant improvement.  No nightmares and he is no longer scared to go to bed or sleep in his own bed now. Mum has been doing SleepTalk™ ‘Foundation’ statements for 7 nights a week, missing only 3 nights out of the past 6 weeks. She reports that her son stated that fairies come and talk to him in his sleep.

2 months later, Mum said that he has improved in all areas of concern.  Is happy to go to crèche, asking if today is crèche day.  Pooing in the toilet now all the time. He has now turned 4, and 1 week prior to his 4th birthday he decided that when he was 4 he would not wear nappies any more even at night, so  mum  include a supporting statement into the process.  From the day he turned 4, he is no longer in nappies, wakes at night for the toilet and goes back to bed.  Mum loves the process.”

Rebecca McLennan – Victoria Consultant